- Narcissists are attracted to certain types of people.
- Rather than weak, vulnerable people, they tend to go for the strong-willed and talented.
- This is because they see it as a challenge, and they will find more entertainment in taking down someone impressive.
- They are also attracted to people who reflect well on themselves — they like to show off their partner in public, but abuse them behind the scenes.
- Ultimately, it’s all about control.
Being in a relationship with a narcissist is hard work. Even if things appear to be going well, there’s no telling what’s going to set off their narcissistic rage.
They may not always mean to hurt their partners, but more often than not, they do. It’s up to you to decide if you’re willing to take the risk, or try and make the relationship work. Just bear in mind it’ll be emotionally draining, and you may end up getting discarded anyway.
A common misconception is that narcissists go for the weak, because they are easier to manipulate. In fact, narcissists prefer to try and hook someone in who is strong-willed, and who has talents or characteristics they admire. That way, they feel more accomplished if they succeed in tearing them down.
Shannon Thomas, the author of the book “Healing from Hidden Abuse,” told Business Insider that whatever strength a narcissist zeros in on, “they turn that around and destroy it.”
“I’ve seen that a lot of folks get targeted if they have things like strong family relationships, if they have career success, especially if that career has any sort of public face to it,” she said.